A nothingness-grabbing greed machine

The Power of Flies
Lydie Salvayre

My latest review for Pajiba has appeared, and this time I tackled French author Lydie Salvayre's Power of Flies. Click here to read my review.

In a nutshell: Flies appears to be a fast, easy read, but beware: it may be quick-going, but be prepared for dark and philosophical fare.

Bibliolatry Scale: 4 out of 6 stars

Thank God this was free

Larryisms: Book One
Larry John

For the record, Larry John seems like a nice guy. He seems like the type who could swig back a few beers, tell a few stories, and eat so much off the grill that you feel like an anorexic supermodel standing next to him. And to that I say: Bravo, Larry John.

However, a good drinking buddy does not a good author make, so I’m just gonna call this one like I see it right from the get-go: at best, this is a bathroom book, plain and simple. At worst, well, it’s a waste of money, but I got it for free, so no worries on my end.

I received Larryisms (Book One, mind you) as part of LibraryThing’s Early Reviewer program. It’s a short book, filled with the wit and wisdom of one Larry John, a self-proclaimed “pragmatic thinker.” On his website, Larry defines the pragmatic thinker as “a person who observes oneself, other people and the issues of the world around them, as ‘practically’ as possible.” Larry intends Larryisms: Book One as an introduction to this philosophy. Larry further explains that “applying the philosophy of pragmatic thinking to your business life as well as your personal life will enable you to more fully understand your day to day existence and enjoy what life has to offer.”

Wow! I’m all about enjoying life and understanding my everyday existence. Let’s dive in.

Hm. Larry wonders, “Do we really have to get along?” Deep.

Now he offers, “People are so overrated.” So true.

Later, he ponders, “Solitude is hard to find even when you’re alone.” Preach it, brother!

Now consider this question for the ages: “Even when it is totally dark you still have to close your eyes to sleep. Why is that?” Yes, why is that? It’s an impenetrable mystery, I know. Perhaps one day anatomists will be able to solve the mystery of the eyelid.

Multiply these deep thoughts by about 100 and now you have Larryisms. I’m glad Larry is very pro-thinking – thinking seems to be a dying art these days – but I’m not sure what I would have thought had I paid 15 bucks for this book.

In a nutshell: Great for when you're feeling a little backed up ... but Book One?!? May the Fates save us from Book Two.

Bibliolatry Scale: 1 out of 6 stars

Where art thou, o my innocence?

Philosophy in the Boudoir
Marquis de Sade

I have a confession: I have judged a book by its cover.

But first let me say this: I am not a prude. I don’t object to porn – that is, when it’s labeled as such. I may not seek it out, but I’m not morally opposed to it. But when it’s passed off as “philosophy” – then that’s another story.

To be fair, Philosophy in the Boudoir was philosophic. But the philosophy was buried ugh too many sandwich jokes are coming ugh too many coming jokes are


SYSTEM OVERLOAD


Aherm. Let me start at the beginning. I liked the cover. I thought it was philosophy. Plus, "boudoir" is such an underrated word. So I bought the book. And, like any good reader of philosophy, I started with the introduction. But when the introduction gives away the ending, a scene of “brutal” and “truly sadistic rape,” I did what any good American would do – I skipped right to the end.

What met my poor beleaguered eyes was not so much philosophy as it was a glorification of every example of depraved behavior possible: incest, adultery, even murder. Look, I'm cool with many of the "depravities" praised by Sade: I love teh gays, so I don’t see sodomy as a problem. If you want to commit adultery be my guest, I don’t give a shit. S&M's not my bag, but whatever, baby. Neither do I care if you wanna fuck your brother, although that's just gross as far as I'm concerned. Go for it. But rape? Gang rape? Of your mother? For real?

I know how you feel, kid

You’re probably sitting there saying, “It’s the Marquis de Sade, you donkey. What did you expect?” But I saw ads for this book in several very respectable publications and the cover was just so quaint and I really didn’t think it would involve [don’t read if you’re squeamish] helping to gang rape your mother and then stitching her up to prevent any children from coming out among other things that I’m trying REALLY hard to forget and I think I might just throw out this book but I do have an aversion to throwing out books even though I did throw out that copy of the Necronomicon I was dumb enough to buy but that was for superstitious reasons and it gave me the willies just like Philosophy in the Boudoir so keeping that in mind maybe it would be okay to throw it out WHEW.

To prevent another system overload, let me at least attempt a brief overview: Philosophy in the Boudoir is a “play” written in seven “dialogues.” It begins when Madame de Saint-Ange receives notice that a young virgin, Eugenie, will soon be arriving to receive an “education” in the form of sexual awakening. Along with her brother and their friend, Dolmance, Saint-Ange will educate Eugenie in the ways of the world. Along the way, Sade drops in some of his "philosophy," namely that anything natural (and not surprisingly, Sade considers everything natural) is good.

Furthermore, Sade really doesn’t have a problem with any "sin"; he glorifies it all, even crimes like theft and murder. Regarding murder, he writes, "In short, murder is a horror, though a horror that is often necessary, never criminal, and indeed essential...the sole offense that a man can commit...is suicide."

Ah, so he does, at least, have one scruple.

Did I mention how charming the cover is? The artist is Tomer Hanuka. Yay for Tomer. Boo for Sade.

In a nutshell: My eyes! My eyes! Where art thou, o my innocence?

Bibliolatry Scale: 0 out of 6 stars